Mr. Fix-It Brought to you by:

By John Fischer

With every change in technology comes the reoccurring challenge for adults…how do we deal with these changes with our kids! When my wife came home from getting her nails done the other day, she told me that she had been chatting with a woman whose daughter wanted only a cell phone for her birthday. The daughter was going to be ten years old. I thought this might be an interesting topic as I am a grandparent, parent and former teacher.

At what age should a young person have a cell phone? Obviously, that is your own choice but at the same time, you should not be pressured by the “old standby” that we have so often heard from our kids, “But all the kids have one.” Maybe they do and then again, maybe they don’t. Is there a good reason for your child to have a cell phone, for example security reasons or to monitor health issues or is it just cool to have one these days!

When a child has a cell phone there is a great deal of responsibility involved for the parent as well as the child. If your child has a cell phone it should be a privilege, not a right. Children need to understand that there is cost involved and rules for its use. They need to understand that if you, as the parent, don’t pay the bill the phone will be turned off. If your child overuses the phone or does not follow the rules you and your child have agreed upon then the privilege of having the phone might be lost. Watch out for the argument that “Grandma bought me this phone”! That may be the case but Grandma may not be paying for the service. You can, if necessary, have the phone turned off and your child can still keep the phone! This also works for hardwired phones in a bedroom. The wires to the phone Grandma gave your child can easily be disconnected to a particular room. I have to tell you that many years ago I actually had to do this myself, just ask my 36 year old daughter! Know what? She still loves me!!!!!!!!!!!!

When and where to use a cell phone is a separate issue. Most adults know when it is appropriate to use a cell phone. Many adults have been embarrassed when they have forgotten to turn off their phones and a call comes in at a most inappropriate time.

Students in school tend to text rather than talk on the phone. With the popularity and ease of texting these days, students feel there are no rules for them in school. As a responsible parent, you should be familiar with the cell phone rules in your child’s school. When I decided to do this article, I did a little “unscientific research” and found that a great deal of texting goes on in the classroom during class. As I was writing this article, I got a phone call from a school administrator. I asked him about the prevalence of cell phones in school and he informed me that a cell phone was actually taken from a child in first grade! Yes folks, first grade! I know it is just my opinion but a six-year-old student is much too young to be responsible for a cell phone. I also found in my research that many parents are texting their kids during class. Parents must lead by example and follow rules. Texting a child in the middle of class definitely sends a message to your child that the school rules for cell phones don’t apply to them. If you need to contact your child during school hours, call the office. The teachers and principals will appreciate it. Too much of their time is spent on the use of electronic devices and often devices are misplaced or stolen. Support the school and lead by example!

I do think (at least I hope) that these examples of cell phone use in schools are rare and most families respect school rules. Most children have respect for their parents and adults in general. Parenting in this situation is not an easy job. It’s so much easier to look the other way and do nothing! Oops. This is starting to sound like a sermon!!!!!!!! I apologize, but I felt that this topic was important and that parents need to be aware.

Hints:

If you decide your child needs a cell phone consider a prepaid phone. You have better control of the cost and use!

You know you have a problem when your phone bill comes in a box! No kidding!

When you use your cell phone, your kids may be watching. Is it an appropriate time?

Do you use your cell phone while driving? You’re sending a message to your child. Children look to you as a role model and they will do what you do.